Saturday, September 13, 2008

Channeling Sam

I've been concerned about the NPPL. For real. And now there's the whole hurricane thing thumping Houston and damaging the stadium. Thank God the parking lot is okay so far as we know.
My concern began before the current regime. It began when registrations event-to-event, year-to-year started to slip. But then Pacific Paintball stepped up and took over and everyone felt sure a corner had been turned. Pacific was backed by a large forward thinking advertising company and the word was they had a plan. A plan only a chosen few were privy to (I sure as hell wasn't included and no reason I should have been) but even so everybody said these were the guys to save paintball. With their secret plan.
So what did they do?
Took all the goodwill of positive press and being the new guys and did the same damn things that contributed to sinking the old guys; change nothing but hype it like crazy--aw--awwwwwh, turned a blind eye to (obviously) poor reffing--Awwwwwwhhhh, while insisting they do so have effective gun rules--AWWWWWHHHHHHHHH!
Find themselves hemorrhaging divisional teams and offer discounted Pro Division entries.
But they --aw--awwwwwh--Awwwwwwhhhh--AWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHH!--have a secret plan!
See the 7-man format struggling and decide the way forward is to directly compete against themselves with the XPSL.
But they--aww--awwwwwh--AWwwwwhhhh--AWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHH!--have a secret plan!
Buy a magazine to promote their vision when virtually every dead tree print publication in existence is concerned about its survival.
But they--awww--awwwwwhh--AWwwwwhhhh--AWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHH!--have a secret PLAN!
Focus on another paintball TV show (they insist the network is paying to produce) that to every appearance hasn't made one iota of difference!
But they--awww--AWwwwwhhh--AWWWWWWHHHH--AWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHH!--HAVE A SECRET PLAN! AND THEY ARE MARKETING GENIUSES!

Aw, I feel much better.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with Sam Kinison check out the link. Rated:R
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1P1QtBmPHGw

5 comments:

original-anonymous said...

You can't shine a turd.

raehl said...

The plan isn't a secret. It's simple: Acquire a bunch of paintball outlets and use your new, large outreach to succeed at selling advertising where previous efforts failed. And it's not an unreasonable plan either. It's way better than the 'we'll put it on TV and then everything else will just happen!' plan.

Baca Loco said...

It's working like a charm, too. Nor is that the actual plan (or complete plan) which I do know somewthing about.
And who are the guys on TV right now?

raehl said...

I wasn't referring to a current get paintball on TV plan, just the previous failed ones.

original-anonymous said...

It was a pre paintball recession plan that MIGHT have "worked" at best.

The point is none of it is executed properly. Look at pb2x, look at paintball.com, look at the NPPL! They are all shells of a former intity that had sucess. Currently I truely can't say any of them are successful, or are speeding in that direction. PB2X will die period, paintball.com will adopt someone else's format when they realize they can't do it themselves, and lets not even get into the NPPLs future...